A few days back, a dear friend of mine called me up really late at night. Worried, I picked up and became more worried when I realized he was all panicky. But when he told me the reason of his panic, I was amused. His parents wanted him to meet some girl for ‘matrimonial cause’. I told him to meet the girl with an open mind as all it was just a meeting.
Then he confided to me about the emotional turmoil he has been going through. He is supposedly ‘in love’. But he is confused because the object of his affection has not actually committed to him. She is in a relationship with someone for nearly 10 years. At the same time, as she confided to my friend, she has been two-timing her boyfriend with someone in her office! And now she has been telling my friend that she would eventually break-up with both and come to him. In the meantime, she seeks support of my pal as she is often emotionally distraught due to this tug-of-war between the two men (and now she has the nerve to involve my friend!).
Any sane mind would warn my friend that this girl spells TROUBLE! But my friend feels emotionally connected her (damn these ‘emotions’!!!) In his words, “I feel she is getting trapped in an emotional quick-sand”. I curse the word ‘emotion’!
Now, this friend of mine has also recently broken up with his long-time girlfriend. So he has also been feeling a bit vulnerable and in the process of offering his shoulder to the cry-baby, he is slowly getting hooked to her. He thinks their stories of heart-break are somewhat similar and, thus, they are soul mates.
He is today confused regarding two aspects: firstly, whether she is the right one for him and secondly, what if she is the rebound for him?
So, around 3.30 am, I was attempting to play agony aunt to my dear friend. Although I am not an authority on affairs of human heart, I tried to reason with him. Betraying the trust of my sisterhood, I told him how we girls are really good or rather, brilliant in faking everything. I humbly requested him to let that girl take her decisions herself. He should strictly tell the girl to handle the two affairs herself and come to him only after the mess is sorted. It’s a mess created by her and should be ended on her own. Why should my friend bear the brunt of two jilted lovers or for that matter, a bad Karma of being the ‘home-wrecker’? I told him if the girl has genuine feelings for him, she will take the necessary steps herself. Rest things will take shape themselves. Thank god, he understood my point.
Now coming to his second apprehension, well, only time will tell if she is the rebound (all depends if it ever happens between them). Thus, he should wait and watch. Once the girl comes out clean and strong and commits to him, he would eventually know it himself. Then I gave him an amusing lesson on matters of heart.
‘The Rebound’ is something that’s pretty interesting. Many would view such a ‘relationship’ with curious thoughts. But I see it in a ‘fun’ light.
I am a Cappuccino girl. But an occasional Café Latte breaks the monotony and rejuvenates you. To move on from a failed relationship in which you had invested so much emotions and time, the rebound works like the Café Latte. Having a fling with someone, who is so not your type, can work like magic. You risk your feelings, you tread an unknown ground and it gives you a high. And this high feeling heals the wounds of the broken relationship. You feel rejuvenated, all set for a new love chapter in your life-story.
Thus, I advised my friend to take one step at a time. If and when the girl commits to him, he should let actions speak louder than any forced emotions. If there is any sign of it being a rebound for both of them, then he should simply enjoy the moment and let go once he feels he is ready for the next story. ‘The Rebound' does help you to bounce back into lively life!!!